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Monthly Archives: February 2016

Life is a state of permanent amnesia, a world in search of new forms of escapism and quick, sensual gratification.

    Nearly everything we do to enlarge our world, to make life more

              interesting, more varied, more exciting, more vivid, more “fabulous”,

        more promising, in the long run has an opposite effect. In the ext-

             ravagance of our expectations and in our every increasing power, we

        transform elusive dreams into graspable images within each of us

           can fit. By doing so we mark the boundaries of our world with a wall

               of mirrors. Our strenuous and elaborate efforts to enlarge experience

             have the unintended result of narrowing it. In frenetic quest for the

              unexpected, we end by finding only the unexpectedness we have pla

nned for ourselves. We meet ourselves coming back.

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ben

Sometimes you become blind to that of which is in front of you. The love is undeniably there, it is apparent, it is strong, but all it feels is wrong. The choice to become a better self has always been there, like God awaiting… To test the prayer, I feel incredibly shy and utterly vulnerable. All I want is to seek great, nothing more–nothing less. To test the prayer is the answer for what I shall do now is to reap what I sow.  It is made, but I do not know. (Tuesday: 12:30 am)